Sometimes I'm Less Than Smart

Thursday was an interesting day. It started normal, me taking Greg to school by 8:00, chill at home for an hour, then eat breakfast. As I was finishing breakfast, I accidentally knocked my bowl of cereal on the floor. Thinking I'd be a good wife, I decided I would try to clean it up myself. I've learned that I can get to my knees by sliding off the couch, so I went to the living room and got on my knees.

As I was walking on my knees towards the kitchen, I thought, "This will take forever. Why don't I just crawl?" So I lean forward to put my hands on the ground. Unfortunately, I have very little upper body strength, so instead of catching myself, my head just kept going and hit the ground. As soon as that happened, I said (out loud), "That was stupid Breanne."

I stayed that way for a little while, with my butt in the air, head on the ground before trying to figure out a way to get up. I couldn't push myself into a crawling position, so I flattened myself to the ground. Then I laid there for a while. Then I rolled over so I could try and figure something out. About this time I looked at the clock and it was 9:20. I still had plenty of time to get up, and finish getting ready for work.

Yeah right! That was not smart of me to think. I spent a lot of time thinking about my different options. Now, I didn't have my phone with me. It was blasting One Direction on the kitchen table. I could have army crawled/wiggled my way into the kitchen to see if I could read the top of the table from the ground, but I was going to get myself up all by myself. Instead, I decided to go to our back bathroom where we have a little step going up to the bathroom. I thought that if I could make it back there I could crawl my way up the step and tub.

I army crawled backwards the entire way,  pausing about every 30 seconds so I could rest and catch my breath. My rests were about 5 minutes long, so it took a while to get back there. Once I maneuvered my way into the bathroom and over to the tub, I tried everything I could possibly think of to try to get up. Absolutely NOTHING worked! No matter what way I twisted or turned, I did not have the strength in my arms or legs to push myself up. As I lay there with my head on the step (it's all carpeted, so it was quite comfortable), I thought about just taking a nap. I was so exhausted, I seriously could have. But then I thought, "My co-workers are probably worried that I'm not on time." So I did not nap.

But as I lay there, and crawled my way through the house, I had a lot of time to think, and wish I had a life alert so I could get ahold of someone. I considered going back to the kitchen to get my phone, which did not sound fun at all, so I didn't. Luckily my tablet was just in my bedroom, so if I could make it in there, I could see what I could do.

I first looked at the time... 10:30!! Then I shot my co-workers an email letting them know I was still coming, I'd just be late. Then I considered adding my other co-worker Caleb as a friend on facebook to see if he could come over, since Greg was at work, and I didn't want to bother him. I finally decided to just facebook message Greg and see if he could come and save me. Luckily he was able to, and helped me up.

It was a very strange hour and a half. I had so many weird, random thoughts rolling through my head. I was just grateful that Greg was able to come get me.

When I finally got to my phone, I saw that I had missed two calls from my boss. I sent a text telling them I would be there shortly (Steve had emailed me back saying they were worried, and asked if everything was okay.)

Greg then told me that Danny had called him asking if I was okay and that he was going to come over. At that time Greg was already on his way, so he told Danny not to worry about it. Agh! It was so frustrating, and so embarrassing. I really was just trying to do something a typical housewife does. It was extremely frustrating.

I am grateful that my husband was able to find a way over to get me, and I'm also grateful for concerned co-workers. Danny had apparently left to make he way over when he finally got a hold of Greg. I felt so bad! But appreciate their awareness of me, and willingness to help me. I did let them all know where our secret key is, so if our house is ever burglarized, they're getting the first blame.

Also, Greg said I'm not allowed to get on the floor anymore. So much for trying to be somewhat independent!

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